Trust is constantly on my mind these days. My husband and I found out that I am pregnant. Anyone who has read my previous work for Catholic Exchange knows that I have had three miscarriages and spent 3.5 years afflicted with post-partum depression and anxiety. The doctors know why I had miscarriages and my Catholic NaPro doctor told me three years ago that she could possibly help us have another successful pregnancy. In the meantime, she was able to begin treating my severe hormone deficiencies.
At that time, I had just suffered my third and most traumatic loss which resulted in emergency surgery. The post-partum that had developed 10 weeks after I gave birth to my daughter, deepened after each loss. That was not the time for another child. My husband and I knew that God wanted us to heal and walk the Cross of post-partum depression. My body also needed major healing after all it had been through. We didn’t know when the post-partum would lift and we knew the risk of me getting it after another pregnancy was high. Thankfully, NaPro offers a post-partum depression progesterone treatment that has helped a lot of women.
After that difficult time, we didn’t know or think we would have any more children, but God’s ways are not our own. It would have been imprudent to try and I wrote about the need for prudence in such decisions. God calls each one of our families to a different path to holiness and we cannot compare our situation to the person sitting next to us in the pew because we have no idea what they are going through, can handle, or what God is asking of them. Being judgmental is a sin for a reason and it stems from the destructive sin of pride. But, God is also not done with any of us. Crosses lift, evolve, or take a new shape. Old Crosses disappear and new ones take their place. In all of these we are called to trust.
One Reply to “Turning to Mary and Trusting When It’s Hard”
Congratulations on your pregnancy! Prayers that you and your baby remain healthy and you can bring him/her to full term! I believe you are on the right track – turning to Mary and placing your trust in Jesus. I firmly believe that through your consecration to Mary and by taking your prayers to Jesus through her, your prayers will be answered. I speak from experience as I have done the same with my newborn grandchildren. Our Mother has always come through.
I am a first-timer to your blog and I really like what I see. Your devotion is inspiring. I would like to invite you to peruse my blog, http://www.reflectionsofalaycatholic.com. I am a relatively new Catholic and I write mostly about my personal experience of how God is present to me. I don’t yet have the confidence to discuss global issues as they relate to our faith, but I’m working on it, and reading and learning from holy men and women like you will help me get there. Keep up your good work!